How to Write an Obituary: A Step-by-Step Guide with Example

What an obituary is for

An obituary does two practical jobs: it announces a death and it tells people how to be there for the family. Somewhere in between, it also paints a brief picture of a life. You're not writing a biography or a eulogy here — you're writing a clear, dignified notice that informs, while still letting a little of the person shine through.

Most obituaries follow a familiar shape, which is a relief when you're grieving and don't want to invent anything. Work through the pieces below in order and you'll have a complete draft faster than you'd expect.

What to include

A standard obituary covers the same core elements. You can keep it spare or expand any section, depending on the family's wishes and the cost of publishing.

• —The announcement: full name, age, city, and the date they died (cause is optional).
• —Brief biography: birth date and place, parents, education, career, military service.
• —Family: who survives them and who preceded them in death, named by relationship.
• —Character and life: a few lines on passions, faith, accomplishments, and what they were known for.
• —Service details: date, time, and location of the funeral, visitation, or celebration of life.
• —Donations: any charity the family prefers in lieu of flowers.

Step by step

If a blank page is paralyzing, build it in this order and stitch it together at the end:

• —Start with the factual announcement sentence — name, age, place, date.
• —Add the biographical spine in roughly chronological order.
• —List family members, surviving first, then those who predeceased them.
• —Write two or three sentences that capture who they really were — the part people will recognize.
• —Close with the service information and any donation request.
• —Read it aloud, trim repetition, and check every name, date, and spelling twice.

A short example

Here's a complete, adaptable example you can use as a template:

"Margaret 'Peg' Ellison, 78, of Boulder, Colorado, passed away peacefully on June 9, 2026, surrounded by her family. Born March 2, 1948, in Lincoln, Nebraska, to Walter and Ruth Hayes, Peg moved west as a young teacher and spent thirty years in the Boulder Valley schools, where hundreds of children learned to love reading because of her. She is survived by her husband of 54 years, Tom; her children, Sarah (David) and Michael (Lena); five grandchildren; and her sister, Joan. She was preceded in death by her parents and her brother, Gary. Peg was happiest in her garden, at her grandchildren's ballgames, and with a paperback in hand. A celebration of her life will be held at 11 a.m. on June 16 at First Congregational Church, with a reception to follow. In lieu of flowers, the family asks that donations be made to the Boulder Public Library Foundation."

Practical details: cost and submission

Newspapers usually charge by the line or word, and the price can climb quickly, especially for photos or weekend editions — ask for the rate before you write to length. The funeral home will often handle submission and can guide you on format and deadlines. Online obituaries and memorial pages are typically free or far cheaper and let you write at length.

Whatever you do, slow down on the facts. Misspelled names and wrong dates are the most common and most painful errors, and they're permanent once published. Have at least one other family member proofread before it runs.

From obituary to eulogy

The obituary handles the facts; the eulogy is what people will actually carry home from the service. Don't try to make one do the other's job — a list of dates read aloud won't move anyone, and a string of stories won't tell people when to show up.

Once the obituary is submitted, the eulogy is usually the next thing on your plate. If you're not sure how to begin, our eulogy builder turns a few honest memories into a finished speech you can read aloud — built around stories, not the facts you've already covered.